My First entry....

[Sarah Walker]

I joined here awhile ago, and promptly forgot about it. I started making changes in my life and wanting to put some time in on me and it quickly fell to the side. I am really not good at making time for me , even if it is for my health. There were alot of things going on in my life, that it wasnt the right time for me to jump into anything else...well now its become a must not a want. My health has taken a turn for the worse and for a 33 yo woman I really shouldnt feel this old.Feeling old is actully and understatment because currently its 9pm and I am in bed, exhausted....again. I am a mama of five and I am unable to give my full best to my kids, because I have nothing left. At the end of the day , I have nothing.  I am going to list my health problems here , not becuase I want people to read it and feel sorry for me, but because I am going to use this place as my go to. I decided that facebook had to go because it wasnt really doing anything good for me, so my hope is that I can come here, and gain knowledge, friendship and support.

Alright here are my truths guys....

-overweight [I am currently 233.5lbs and 5'7] . Though this isnt the biggest I have been its certainly the worst I have felt.

- High blood pressure

-Really bad PMS and other menstral type issues.

- Sleep problems, I need to much.

- Depression

- Anxiety

- swelling of my hands, feet and face

- itchy skin , all over itchy skin

- itchy eyes

- bad skin

- no sex drive

- breathing problems

- knee and other joint problems

- really bad stomach pains and aches

You would think with all this, eating better would just be a no brainer. I am addicted..I am addicted to bad food. It wasnt always this way. At a few points in my life , I actully cared how I felt and looked but it seems since baby five arrived....I just dont care. Or I should say, I DIDNT . Now I do. The catalyst I think for me, and this is just me being honest here is that I have people around me dropping likfe flies and it scares me. some are dying and some have just had to recreate their worlds drastically becuase of health problems. I dont want to die or have to be forced into bed rest because of the choices I am making. I dont want to lead this life anymore.

You would think that I would be able to do this no problem. I am an organic farmer! I have a huge grden filled with a mix of vegetables. But still I put off and put off . I am  very much addicted to coffee and sugar. I love things that are just not good to me, even though I feel sick afterward. I still eat it. I sometimes feel like a drug addict.

I need help , and I really dont know where to find it. which is why I am here . I need someone to get on my case and to care long enough to get me started, but I have been looking for that someone for way to long that now its become a reason not to.

So I am jsut gonna do this thing and see where I end up. I am not going to make any hefty promises to myself, other then to try and live each day as it is given me and take care of myself. I suppose I am going to make some big demands on myself though , because tommorow will be the start of the first day without coffee. ack. I know I need to do this as I feel like crap before I get my morning cup and I feel like crap afterwards too. Its like an additct running after that first high..lol. yet maybe not as intense.

Anyway. I need help, and as you can see I am super ready to be honest with myself, and I want to be honest with others too. I need to keep this totally real.

peace

Sarah

 

[Betty]

Sarah, such an honest post! you are definitely in the right place, but no one can hold you accountable but yourself. You have 5 beautiful children that are on your side, that's your cheerleeding squad :-)

Other members here have given you great advice, don't beat yourself up, because expecting to go 100% raw right away can lead to much guilt if you fail, so definitely, one step at a time. You make a choice with every meal. I know what you mean by having a coffee addiction, but you know what? after a while of eating more raw, I find I can go a few days without feeling like I need one. I only drink coffee because I enjoy it now.  When I started eating more raw foods last year, I started with a green smoothie every day....and slowly progressed to adding more during my day. It helped to join Penni's initiatives, with tons of great recipes.

There are so many delicious recipes you can make, or you can keep it very simple:  A big bowl of fruit/berries/ or melons for breakfast, fruit whenever you feel hungry during the day, and a big salad later on in the day. 

Look around here in the community, you can find great ideas that your children would enjoy as well I'm happy every time someone decides to take their life back, and get back to perfect health, lots of energy, and a joy for life. We need more fully vibrant people in the world. Good luck on your journey, you can do it!!

[mary]

Welcome, you are in the right place for support and info!  You can do it!

[djd]

Dr. Graham says eat your fruit first.  :-)  I find I don't need any other stuff when I am full of ripe fruit.

[Sarah Walker]

Thanks guys, all of you. To wake up this morning with this kind of support in my mailbox is well awesome and I thank you from the bottom of my heart. This is an emotional jounrney for me more then its even a food choice one. This is more about not beating myself up with bad food because of guilt of past actions. I am done trying to overdose myself. 

I am unsure what the next step is at this point, becuase I will be honest I am scared of going 100% raw because I am scared of failing, but at the same time if you tell a herion addict that you have to come off but your allowed a little bit if you want it, that thought scares me even more becuase really it wont be long for me till I am saying to myself....you dont really need to eat this way...you dont really need to care...food isnt THAT important. our gorgeous fat...no need..you get the picture.

So my plan is.....one step , one bite, one leap at a time. One meal at a time, and no beating myself up if something happens and I eat something I know will hurt me. My body will show me, I have faith in that. Through this whole thing , my body has actully stayed pretty consistant. Its felt like crap. If thats not proof that you can trust your body , I am not sure what is.  So one step and to write through the struggles , voice them and see them for what they are...struggles..not failures. My mindset is in the right place , I am ready to kick this addiction. Thanks!

[meherbani Kaur]

I remember when I wanted to turn my, in my terms, self-destructive ways around-- eating a lot of processed foods, junk foods empty of any nutrition-- I remember thinking totally unrealistically, off the wall nonsense, that I was going to go 100% raw from day one.

not thinking process through at all;

best thing I remember hearing... this way of eating is not about deprivation, ie taking things out of your/my diet but adding wonderfully nutritious foods one day at a time, or meal at a time.

like starting with  breakfast, or even each meal, add something wholesome... what ever you can do and because you are in a wretched state energetically and physically, as you've described... you didn't get here overnight, and please, don't be like me, thinking changes happen over night...

or you'll frustrate yourself back into your old ways.

baby steps, inch by inch, bite by bite... let things be added as they can be and watch the accumulative effect bring miracles to you as it has to soooooo many others, including me.

bringing yourself accountable here, now... what's the next step, and the next etc.

holding you up to only doing that which is doable for you... nothing more.

great love to you.

[Supermom]

That was beautifully honest and addresses the physical symptoms that a huge percentage of our population is experiencing.  The difference with you is, "you are aware that there is something better, and are willing to pursue it!" Yah! Yippee! You rawk! I am so happy for you!

Every journey begins with one step!  You have found a safe place to fall in love with life!  The type of support you will get here is heartfelt, real, and positive. It starts with eating raw foods and quickly progresses to healing of all kinds.  When we are present and not covering our emotions with substances, it is time to de-clutter, simplify, forgive, and practice a positive attitude and thoughts.

It's time to prove to our sub-concous mind that we will follow through. We absolutely can make up our minds to keep moving forward with baby steps and not beat ourselves up when we decide to eat something that no longer serves us.  We just observe ourselves doing it and make the next bite raw. 

I love that over time our bodies begin to lead us by craving things like kale!  I used to crave sweets and junk food, but now it is green blended soups!  This lifestyle is such a joy! Living foods that we crave after a couple of weeks; feeling better ever day (after the initial detox period that is),  and the domino effect that improves all the other areas of our life!

I love to visit Susan's blog to renew my mind and practice thinking positive thoughts and refreshment. Welcome Sarah!