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Just A Little Arsenic

I have come to believe there are two kinds of people: the Moderation People and the "Better-off-leaving-it-alone" People. The past few months have convinced me, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that I am a card carrying member of the second group.

I wish I was a Moderation Person! I would love to be one of these people who could have "just a bite" or handle "just this once and I'll get right back on track tomorrow." For some people, that must be true. Weight Watchers has built a whole program around that concept. For me, however? "Just a bite" is just a big FAT lie. I find myself in a ditch with tire tracks running over me and wondering what the heck happened, anyway.

So although I wish it were different, I am totally at peace with being the Better-Off-Without-It girl. Meat? I'm better off without it. (And so are the animals!) Ditto for dairy, and ditto for sweets, even raw ones, sadly. I would SO rather STAY on track, then try to get BACK on track. You get what I'm saying?

For me, the stuff that I should leave alone is like a little bit of arsenic. Poison. I wouldn't eat a little bit of arsenic, no matter how good it tasted. It would kill me.

I once weighed over 400 lbs. It almost killed me. I was digging my grave with a fork and a spoon.

So I am done with "experiments" of trying to be a Moderation Person. It is too risky. I'm not a-going there.

Just like an ex-smoker can't have "just one puff" or a someone who has overcome alcohol should not have one drink. For me, it's certain foods. It's just how it is. I accept that.

In fact, I rejoice, because I see what I DO get to have! I just went through the recipes and pictures in Penni's new Resolve to Evolve and seriously drooled people! I am done mourning for what I can't have, I can honestly say. And I am so GRATEFUL to Penni for all she has done. Because I may not be able to have some things, but what I do get have is incredible.

I am eating like my life depends on it. It does. Thank you, God, for leading me to the answers. And please bless Penni and Susan and everyone else who is making a path back to health for people like me.

The Grateful Flawed. :)

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Comment by Elizabeth Spear on March 3, 2012 at 6:17am: Thank you for the inspiration. I am an ex drug & alcohol addict & an ex smoker. The past two years I have completely turned around & am trying to live a healthy life & treat my body with respect. I am an emotional eater. Sometimes I'm fine, then other times I JUST CAN'T STOP! It's a struggle but I will never give up trying. I have completely cut out a lot of foods but there are some that I'm still working on. "I am eating like my life depends on it"...good point Heather. Thank you.

Comment by Laura on January 3, 2011 at 5:37pm: As I like to say, "it's better to abstain than refrain." Having a bite then having to refrain from having more bites is really too much. I'm with you all the way on this one. When I focus on the great things that I can eat (rather than mourning the poison that I can't), I like to sing the part of the Crosby Stills and Nash song "Carry On" that goes, "rejoice, rejoice, we have no choice".

Good on ya!

Comment by Marianne on January 1, 2011 at 9:19am: I am so with you Heather, I had smoked for 39 years, gave up overnight 11 years ago and wonder why I ever did it but 1 small puff and I know that I would be a smoker again. I once went on a really stupid diet, I ate nothing, thats right ABSOLUTELY NOTHING for 10 weeks I had what they call food replacement shakes and soups. Once I started eating food again I couldn't stop and all the weight + was back in 3 months. Thankfully I gave up alcohol some 30 years ago, don't like the smell nor the taste so no point LOL. However, and a huge however that is, chocolate is my downfall and I know that I must must must not have even a tiny bit of the wonderful delicious raw cacao because it will reactivate my need for the horrendous rubbish that they sell millions off every day. Yep, definitely a Better off without it gal here too.

You have always been such a great inspiration Heather, thanks for bringing this subject to the fore, something I had not really thought about for the initiative but just as important if not more so, to think of it now.

Comment by bitt on December 31, 2010 at 9:53pm: There are foods like that I can't even have one taste of. Also alcohol. It's ok to turn stuff down. I think the moderation people are often afraid of letting others down.

Comment by Monica Hall on December 31, 2010 at 5:58pm: Very powerful and I have come to find out I am also a Better Off Without It chick.

Comment by Donna on December 31, 2010 at 5:31pm: We need a "Better Off Leaving It Alone" room, ha!

I'd be the FIRST to join.

Comment by Brenda Lynn on December 31, 2010 at 5:20pm: I hear you Heather! I am also one of those people. I recently went to a friend's house and she has jars of M & M's and skittles and such just sitting out and never touches the stuff. I couldn't do it. I just cannot have it in the house. Sugar for me is poison! As is cheese! I'm looking forward to eliminating those from my life again, but now hopefully once and for all!! You are an inspiration too Heather!!

Comment by Vegan♥for♥Life on December 31, 2010 at 3:59pm: So cool Heather. You are learning you...

Comment by simone carlisle on December 31, 2010 at 3:32pm: i totally get where you are!

Comment by Jean on December 31, 2010 at 2:54pm: Heather you are so right. One should not take arsenic and then try to take the antidote because they had to try the arsenic. Doing this over and over is not good for the body (funny I tell people this all the time).

I tend to be a "better off leaving it alone person". Desserts I make and take to share with those at work that are raw vegans and vegetarians or gluten issue people. This way I can have my cake but the rest is teaching others they have more choices.